The need for less “Do as I say” & more “Do as I do” in parenting !


One of my favorite aspects of being a mom is the ability to learn and grow with each day that my children grow. I previously wrote on this blog about setting the proper example because our children are naturally always watching and modeling after our every movements and patterns. What I failed to realize is that, while I was making adjustments to the major things, I was neglecting the everyday small habits I had grown over time that are so natural for me I barely notice them.

Often when I am in the car, I tend to have conversations via Bluetooth with my mother or my girlfriends, and without thinking about it I will throw out a curse word or two, possibly three 🤣. Do not even get me started about my road rage in the car when I am in a rush to get somewhere. I often catch myself apologizing to the kids or having to catch myself mid curse word to correct it with something like “fudge”, “biscuit”, “shizzle cakes”, darn it”, or a bunch sounds that make no sense at all.

It comes as no surprise to me that my five year old tries to copy me. I remember one time in the car, on the way to drop him off at school, this Red Toyota Camry cut me off. In the process of having to slam on breaks, I yelled out, “YOU A HOE BRUH, DUMB ASS”. Immediately, Jayden yells out “YOU A HOE BRUH” and starts laughing. Naturally, my first response was “Don’t say that, it’s a bad word” but I wasn’t prepared for his reply back. Jayden asked me, “If it is a bad word then why do you say it?” The problem in this moment is that just telling him “because I’m an adult and can do that” is not the proper response.

We set the tone for our children’s habits both good and bad. Simply telling a child to do as I say and not as I do is not the proper way to set the example. I am in no way perfect at this and I can honestly say I struggle sometimes because these are habits I have built for years, but I recognize where I can improve in what I expose my children to. I cannot ask my son not to yell when he is upset if he always sees me y’all when I am upset. We have got to do better as role models not just in our words but also in our actions.

Let me know what you think about this weeks post and until next time….

Peace and Parenting Love

❤️❤️❤️

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